Have you ever stopped to consider what truly makes you you? Our values are at the heart of who we are – the deeply ingrained beliefs and principles that guide our decisions, shape our actions and influence how we experience the world. Yet, many of us go through life without clearly identifying them, only noticing their importance when we feel out of sync or unsettled. Understanding your values isn’t just about self-awareness; it’s about uncovering the blueprint for a life that feels authentic, purposeful, and fulfilling.
How do you know when you’ve found a value that is truly yours?
Values are what makes a person tick – our blueprint. Most don’t know what theirs are until asked to think about them. This is no surprise, as values don’t pop out of nowhere. They are a theme that runs through our lives. They are who we are – our beliefs, thoughts, actions and habits rolled into one. We don’t inherit our values. Some common values include honesty, kindness, creativity, adventure, and connection.
Values run deep and are unique to you. They are the things you are attracted to and are effortless. Living in alignment with them every day brings a sense of peace and purpose. Your decisions become easier to make, and you feel energised and purposeful, which provides comforting reassurance.
Values are not a need. You don’t need to be kind or honest; you just are. Neither are they something we think we ‘should’ do, and they can’t be forced.
What impact does it have to be immersed in a way of life contrary to your values?
Not living in your values feels like being rubbed up and down against a cheese grater. Nothing feels good, nothing fits, yet you can’t put your finger on why. You are disconnected, unsettled, and out of sorts. It can create tension, frustration, anxiety and sometimes burnout. You are drained and hollow.
How does operating from your values supercharge your life and actions?
Operating from your values empowers you. You have clarity, focus, and drive. Decisions are easier because you’re not torn between conflicting priorities. You are living with purpose, and life feels much more meaningful. You act with conviction, which increases your resilience and ability to overcome obstacles, inspiring and motivating you.
Living within your values means making choices and taking actions that align with what you truly believe in. For instance, if you value being inspired, working solo in an office with little creativity will create conflict every day. Living within your values will help you decide to change things.
Living within your values brings a sense of fulfilment. Life feels more meaningful, and this alignment enhances your performance, relationships, and sense of well-being, leaving you content and satisfied.
Here are four examples of using your values to supercharge some popular resolutions.
Losing weight
Suppose health or vitality is a core value. Then, frame weight loss around improving your overall well-being. Focus on habits that nourish your body rather than obsessing over numbers.
Getting fit
If growth or discipline is important to you, treat fitness as a journey of self-improvement. Celebrate the small wins and build consistency around that value.
Finding a romantic partner
If love or connection is crucial, focus on building meaningful relationships where these values thrive rather than chasing superficial traits.
Improving finances
If security or freedom is a value, align financial decisions with creating a future where you feel secure and free, which makes saving or budgeting more purposeful.
What is a good starting point for discovering your values?
Think back over the last three months. Try to place five moments when you felt happy and at peace. Who were you with? What were you doing? Why did it feel good? What did you learn? What was in play – honesty, connection, adventure, enjoying having nothing to do, creativity? This is living in your values.
Conversely, what decisions did you regret? In what circumstances did you feel drained? These were the times your values were compromised.
Repeat this exercise periodically, and patterns will emerge that will guide you to understanding what matters most.
Knowing your values and living in them can increase your life satisfaction enormously. Take time to understand yours and be bold enough to live in them.
You won’t regret it.